Throw Back Thursday – A Twofer

3rd Grade
Sturtevant, Wisconsin
1964

3rd Grade

 5th Grade
Sturtevant, Wisconsin
1966

Whether it be the innocent, naïve, 9 year-old boy or the dapper, sophisticated, man of 11; the sweater works.

What I find most interesting is that these photos were taken two years apart. Last week’s Throw Back Thursday was taken in the intervening year. Aren’t boys supposed to be growing at that age? How long did that sweater fit?

I remember loving that sweater though. It was like something ‘Rob Petrie’ would wear at home on The Dick Van Dyke Show.

What The Heck is Yoga Porn? (NSFW)

Sometimes I feel so old.

Yesterday’s HUFF POST WEIRD NEWS contained an article called; “What Are Your City’s Top Porn Searches?”. The organization “PornHub” compiled a list of the Top 5 search terms used in 24 U.S. cities by people seeking internet porn. They also included the name of the top porn star in each of those cities. None of the names of the porn stars are familiar. Of course, I don’t think I can name a porn star from this century. I am sure they are all talented performers in their chosen fields of expression. A couple of the conclusions that can be drawn from the statistics are disturbing but mostly they are just intriguing.

I should preface by saying I am not a porn aficionado. When I was in college a bunch of guys from the dorm would go out at the end of each term and engage in some binge drinking before staggering off to see whatever skin flick was on offer on campus. In hindsight I realize I was in it more for the alcohol and camaraderie than any real interest in seeing what was going on Behind the Green Door… or what thing the Devil & Miss Jones had going on.

My experience with straight porn was circumscribed to a 2-3 year period in the mid-1970′s. My first experience with gay porn wouldn’t come for another 10 years. I’ve seen some since that time in pubs but it is not something I’ve ever spent much time exploring at home. There is no cache of ‘inspirational’ videos hidden behind the books in the Casa de Harper library so, if we both were to drop dead tomorrow, no one would need to rush over and ‘straighten up’ before the heirs descend.

None of that should be interpreted to mean I disapprove of pornography. As long as it isn’t disruptive to one’s life and the action involves consenting adults of the same species I say ‘get your motor running’. We all have our interests. That just doesn’t happen to be mine.

So what are the key learnings from the PornHub’s search stats? Aside from my general cluelessness; I had to consult the Urban Dictionary to look up a couple of terms, there are some interesting findings.

The most popular individual search term was “massage”. I understand that one…’happy endings’ and all that. It was listed in the Top 5 in 22 of the 24 cities, usually as either first or second. That’s pretty clear-cut. The remainder of the results want a little more interpretation.

There was a tie for the second most popular individual term. “Lesbian” made the Top 5 in 14 cities though usually 4th or 5th. I guess the whole ‘girl-on-girl’ thing is not as popular as I’ve been led to believe.

The other term tieing for second place was “ebony”. The term was more common in larger cities and, where mentioned, it was usually in the Top 2. If one combines the results for the terms “ebony” and “black” however, it moves to first place. I find it interesting that ebony is a more popular term than black for porn shoppers. Who knew?

There are other examples where combining some results yields a clearer picture of people’s interests. Both “mom” and “milf” turned up in the Top 5 in some cities. “Asian”, is in the Top 5 in some cities but cities with large, diverse, Asian populations, like Honolulu and San Francisco, searched for “Japanese” and “Korean” separately.

I had to look up the terms “POV” and “cartoons”. Both are terms with which I am familiar but I confess I didn’t initially understand them in this context. Once again I am confronted by the degree to which I am out of touch with the popular culture. I honestly had no idea that animated porn was ‘a thing’, Not only does it exist but, apparently, it is popular. It made the Top 5 search terms in 5 American cities.

Which leads me to the most confounding of all the results. In both Portland, OR and Minneapolis, MN, one of the Top 5 search terms for people seeking porn on the internet was “yoga”. I’m at a loss. What would ‘yoga porn’ look like exactly? I hastily add the question is rhetorical. It is also an ‘etch-a-sketch question’ because as soon as I visualize the answer I will need to shake my head vigorously to make the picture go away.

On the other hand, “smoking” made the Top 5 search terms for porn seekers in Anchorage, AK and Jacksonville, FL. I guess people are more spiritual and health-conscious Portland and Minneapolis. At least the porn seekers are at any rate.

 

 

 

Throw Back Thursday – 1965

4th Grade
Sturtevant, Wisconsin
1965

Loved the dickies in those days!

 

This photo is a recent find. The natty sophistication belies the fact that I was only 9 years old. I think it must be the dickie. Dickies, possibly second only to ascots, make one look so worldly. Don’t you think?

We moved to Sturtevant, a small village just west of Racine, Wisconsin, in the summer before I started 3rd grade. We lived there about three years.

As school photos go, this one is not too bad. After years of brush cuts I’d let my hair grow out a little and started to part it. I parted my hair on the left in those days. I wonder what prompted me to start parting it on the right later on. The smile seems sincere enough; though it does not quite reach into the eyes.

Of all the old school photos I’ve come across, this one is my least favorite. The Sturtevant years were the least happy of my childhood. It is fascinating how evocative photos can be.

Family Treasure

Mom’s save the strangest things. I found this, no doubt precious, memento among the cache of old photos I received after my mother died a decade ago.

A folded piece of black construction paper forms the cover. The interior pages are construction paper of a color I’ll call Exorcist green. The pages and cover are connected by a piece of black yarn that is in amazing good condition, given it is at least 50 years old.

This must have been a Vacation Bible School project. The cover reads; “Photo Album and Bible Verses”. Even as long ago as my childhood, I don’t think we were doing Bible verses in the public schools.

On the first interior page it reads;

“Thou shalt do that which is right and good in the sight of the Lord – Deuteronomy 6 18″

Sure enough; that is the beginning of Deuteronomy 6-18 in the King James Bible. I must have been copying that from the board. I can easily believe I knew that verse at that age but there is no way I could have spelled Deuteronomy correctly without assistance. I can’t spell it without assistance now.

There is a glue stain indicating a photo is missing from this page. The larger remaining picture shows cousins. The three smaller photos along the bottom are also cousins. The ones at the center and right are two of the same people in the larger photo above it. I think the photo is the lower left is Patti, a cousin on my father’s side of the family…or it could be a complete stranger.

On the second page, the photos are more mysterious. I believe the upper left is another cousin, the brother of the possible Patti on the previous page. Top row center is the third of the three cousins in the larger picture on the previous page. I’m not sure why two of the three made page one while he was bumped to page two. Maybe I wanted to have both sides of the family represented on each page. I probably worried about such things even then.

I think upper right is another cousin. If I am correct then upper left and upper right are both cousins named Steven, through they are from different families. Both of the possible Stevens are sporting fashionable bow ties. Bow ties are cool.

The second row left and right are unknowns. The one on the left looks like he might be one of the California cousins. If true, he was either a third cousin twice removed or a second cousin 3x removed. Second row center, of course, is yours truly. I think that was my first grade school picture. Lower right in a row all to herself is my sister.

The title “…Bible Verses” is misleading as there is only one verse inside. Maybe some pages have been lost along the way. Maybe I was supposed to add more verses as I added more photos. That didn’t happen.

Vacation Bible School was always a hoot. When we weren’t doing things like this album we were gluing shell macaroni on coffee cans and spray-painting them gold. I remember we taped thumb tacks on the end of long skinny balloons and had sword fights, trying to pop the other people balloons. I am sure that would be a lawsuit waiting to happen today but it isn’t a bad metaphor for what it meant to be a Southern Baptist.

When all else failed we would sing:

Vacation Bible School is here
Tra La   Tra La   Tra La
We welcome it with joy and cheer
Tra La   Tra La   Tra La
In God’s own house we like to be
A happy busy band are we
Vacation Bible School is here
Tra La   Tra La   Tra La

The fact that I still remember that song is even more bizarre than finding this childhood artifact.

Old Family Photo – 1935

I discovered an old family photo recently. It’s a photo of the Mrs. Grace Wilson’s Frankfort High School Spanish class; West Frankfort, Illinois. It was the Class of 1935.

The photo is in remarkably good condition, especially considering it is almost 80 years old.

As an artifact of my family’s history this photo is doubly good. The young man in the white shirt seated farthest to the left in the second row is my uncle, Leo Murray (1918 – 1964) , He was my mother’s brother.

Over Leo’s shoulder in the bib overalls, standing second from the left end in the third row is Walter Stahowski (1918 – 2003). As a friend, Wally had occasion to meet Leo’s siblings, including my mother. At the time this photo was taken my mother would have been almost 7 years old. Later in life my mother would marry Wally. He became her second husband when they married shortly after her 69th birthday. He was 79 at the time.

Another reason this photo is a particularly good find for genealogical purposes is, not only is the photo in good condition, but the reverse side lists the name of all those pictured. Even after all these years the writing is quite clear and, even more rare, legible.

One of the things that is terrific about old photos is one can appreciate the ebb in popularity of names. Given the time and place, I was not surprised to see names like ‘Viola’, ‘Hattie’, and ‘Nadine’. I was more surprised to see an ‘Altazurah’. The name ‘Dimple’ is intriguing. Not only is it an uncommon name but I find my self pondering the pros & cons of why it is singular and not plural. Most interesting of all, seated on Mrs Wilson’s left is someone only known as ‘Mafalda’; just like ‘Cher’ or ‘Madonna’. She was clearly a person ahead of her time.

I plan to search Ancestry.com to see whether any of the folks pictured are included in family trees in that site. If I locate any, I will forward the photo to the tree owners. It was a school photo so some may already have it but for others it might be a pleasant surprise.

Dog Park Sunday – March 23, 2014

Spring has arrived in Harper’s Valley. The sun is shining. The temperatures are starting to flirt with the 90*F mark. The mesquite trees have started to drop all manner of crap into the pool share their vernal bounty. And, of course, the scary people and pets have returned to the dog parks. I am not sure where the scary people and pets go during the winter but, wherever it is, they come back in the Spring as sure as swallows return to Capistrano or Tea Party members show up for a white-supremacist rally. At Grover’s Basin Dog Park this morning the scaries were out in force.

It was with a sense of foreboding that Harper and I left the relative security of our Honda Accord. The Hummer parked next to us had just brought forth a charming young couple with the biggest pit bull I’ve ever seen. Picture an over-stuffed ottoman; but self-propelled… and on a mission. Let’s call him Brutus. Brutus was dragging his mom & dad across the parking lot. I found little comfort in seeing that they were using a length of steel cable as a leash. The cable is probably stronger than a leather leash but they say a chain is only as strong as its weakest link. I’m pretty sure the weakest link here was dad’s wrist. Also, the whole arrangement seemed like something one would put together as a result of some kind of lesson previously learned. There are always a lot of sweet pit bulls in the park but we gave this one a wide berth on our way to the large dog enclosure.

Once inside the enclosure I experienced a slight reduction in anxiety. Brutus was trying to chew his way through a cyclone fence to get into the small dog enclosure. He sounded quite serious about it but his dad was explaining to all within ear shot that his dog just wanted to play. Besides, he added; the dog was a little aggressive so he never let him off his leash. I could tell I was not the only one wondering why he brought Brutus to the off-leash enclosure if he couldn’t be trusted ‘off-cable’ but no one asked for fear dad might decide that maybe this was the morning to give ‘off-cable’ another try. We all just backed slowly away without breaking eye contact.

On the other side of the enclosure, Harper was making her usual rounds of sniffing all & sundry. A friendly dog, I’d guess a boxer/rottweiler mix, let’s call him Exlax, paused nearby to make a fairly large pile. There are posted signs reminding people to clean up after their pets but Exlax’ dad, let’s call him Harry, seemed oblivious. I considered saying something to Harry until I noticed he was wearing a holster with a semi-automatic hand gun.  As one pulls into the parking lot, there are signs prohibiting firearms in the park. I decided, since Harry seemed to be on a roll with his ignoring-all-the-signs strategy, I would leave well enough alone. I had to ask myself; did I feel lucky?…. not so much. I decided that Harper and I might enjoy a visit to the nearby small dog enclosure for a change of scenery.

Brutus had been unsuccessful in chewing his way through the fence. Actually, Brutus and his parents were making a tactical retreat back toward their Hummer. The dog park crowd can be an unforgiving lot when confronted with the ill-tempered. Brutus and his parents were feeling some peer pressure from a torch-wielding mob of angry dog owners offering to assist them in locating the exit.

I was happy to see that the pet owners in the small dog enclosure seemed to have left their hand guns at home this Sunday morning; or at least opted to go with a concealed weapons strategy. Yep; the small dog enclosure seemed the right place to be, or so I thought. That was before the arrival of Satan’s own chihuahua. Let’s call him Hannibal Lecter.

I could hear Hannibal coming about a block away. A less-than-fashionable matron was waddling down the hill with no less than 8 leashes clutched in her paw. At the end of each leash was a small dog of varying, often indeterminate, breed. Already testy being on-leash in the pack of the damned, by the time Hannibal got inside the off-leash enclosure he was in the midst of a full psychotic break. I have never heard such vicious-sounding noises come from such a little dog. His mom had fitted him with a leather muzzle that covered about 75% of his face but this did not stop little Hannibal from yapping viciously and lunging at any creature, human and canine alike, that ventured within leash length of him. By the time I heard the third ‘Friend of Dave’ (cranky senior citizen) shout at the matron to get Hannibal out of the park, Harper and I decided we’d sufficiently wrung the joy out of our visit to the dog park for the day. We left.

It’s a rare day when we can’t find tranquility in either enclosure. We probably should have stuck it out a little longer. Brutus was gone. Dirty Harry was on his way out and I could tell the shunning of Hannibal would send him and his cohorts packing in short order. I might have even found a way to turn the whole experience into an icebreaker with some of my fellow dog lovers. Note to self: next time you go the Grover’s Basin – take a torch for the team-building activity.

Podcasts

In the past few months I’ve started listening to podcasts. Like so many things technological, I arrive late to the party. I know podcasts have been around for a while. I was aware of they existed. I just didn’t listen to any.

My first ventures into this particular niche of the media had been unimpressive. I heard people, usually in groups of two or three, talking to, at, and over each other. Often they were trying to be humorous. Occasionally they would be successful, more often, not. But even when the chat was amusing it felt isolating. It didn’t feel like a more intimate form or broadcast communication. It was more like sitting at the kids table watching the adults having a good time. In any case, I never found much benefit for the time invested in listening.

Enter National Public Radio. NPR has a variety of podcasts. I started listening to Fresh Air. I’ve always loved Terry Gross’ radio interview program but find I am rarely in the car to hear it anymore. And the only time I listen to radio is while in the car.

By listening to Fresh Air, I became aware of other NPR podcasts. All Songs Considered and NPR Books have made it to the “My Podcasts” section of my iPhone. There are many more yet to explore. My current favorite of the NPR podcasts is Pop Culture Happy Hour, a weekly conversation among four NPR writers about what is going on in the world of popular culture. This can include anything from graphic novels to grand opera, from indie music to the Tony Awards, and from reality T.V. to popular fiction.

The universe of podcasts is not limited to NPR, of course. Harper’s Other Dad introduced me to The Writer’s Almanac. At first the idea of listening to it seemed lazy, it shows up in my email every day so Protestant Work Ethic would dictate that I should just read it. But the podcast contains more content than the email feed. Also, I was hearing it every morning at 5:30 AM anyway.

“My Podcasts” also includes “Grammar Girl; Quick and Dirty Tips for Better Writing“. She focuses on specific topics in grammar and linguistics. Sometimes the topics are practical tips like when to use semicolons rather than commas or the difference between further and farther. Other times the information falls into the category I like to call; ‘Fun Things to Know and Tell’; interesting factoids about language like why Canadians pronounce some diphthongs differently from Americans, or why we describe the color of pumpkins as ‘orange’ but people with hair that same color are called ‘red-heads’. Grammar Girl podcasts are usually only 6 – 7 minutes long.

I enjoy hearing stories so “My Podcasts” also includes Selected Shorts and This American Life. I recently started listening to a story-telling podcast called Risk – True Tales Boldly Told. This podcast is definitely NSFW as many of the stories contain mature content and language but I am enjoying it.

Another podcast I listen to regularly is Dan Savage’s Savage Lovecast. This one is absolutely NSFW (!!) but for those, like myself, who have enjoyed Mr. Savage’s columns and books, the podcast is interesting and entertaining.

The humor-based podcasts come and go quickly from my list. I like the distraction of humor when it is done well but I am pretty quick-on-the-trigger with my delete key if I conclude it is just a couple of guys making each other laugh.

Exploring the universe of podcasts is a little like surfing the internet at the speed of rust. I’ll read about a podcast or hear someone mention one and make a note to check it out. By the time I get around to finding it, downloading a few and listening to them days, if not weeks, can go by. But the ones I enjoy can change me behavior. This morning I was going to stop for a bagel after dropping Harper’s Other Dad off at work. Then I saw this week’s edition of Pop Culture Happy Hour had downloaded. I opted for a diet Coke at a drive-through window instead so I could stay in my car and listen. I didn’t need those carbs anyway.

I continue to explore. If anyone has any ‘fav’ podcasts, please let me know.